FLASHBACK TUESDAYS:ALMOST DOESNT COUNT

FINALLY I AM BACK ON TRACK (SORTA)


So I was listening to my i-touch in my car on Saturday on shuffle, and I asked God to play and sound that can I can relate to how I feel, and this song came on.

Almost Doesn't Count-Brandy

This is another one of these songs where as a child you loved the song, but didnt get the lyrics until an adult. I finally understand this song forreal and it goes very well with my situation.

I dont want to talk about my situation anymore like that because I want to focus on the positive but I will post the lyrics and bold the words that hit close to home! Its sad how everything was almost coming together for the both of us...but like the freaking song"Almost Doesnt Count" ---Never Give Up Hope.

"Almost Doesn't Count"

Almost made you love me
Almost made you cry
Almost made you happy, baby
Didn't I didn't I
You almost had me thinkin'
You were turned around
But everybody knows
Almost doesn't count

Almost heard you saying
You were finally free
What was always missing for you, baby
You'd found it in me
But you can't get to heaven
Half off the ground
Everybody knows
Almost doesn't count

I can't keep on lovin' you
One foot outside the door
I hear a funny hesitation
Of a heart that's never really sure
Can't keep on tryin'
If you're looking for more
Than all that I could give you
Than what you came here for

Gonna find me somebody
Not afraid to let go
Want a no doubt be there kind of man
You came real close
But everytime you built me up
You only let me down
And everybody knows
Almost doesn't count

Maybe you'll be sorry
Maybe you'll be cold
Maybe you'll come runnin' back, baby
From the cruel cruel world
Almost convince me
You're gonna stick around
But everybody knows
Almost doesn't count
So maybe I'll be here
Maybe I'll see ya around
That's the way it goes
Almost doesn't count

PARANOID

So the topic of the day is paranoia.

Why are people so paranoid?

I have the answer...because people cant be trusted!

When you are in a relationship I dont think people want to be paranoid, but we live in a world of cheaters and decievers and its very hard to tell if people are being honest anymore.

We live in a world that people lie to us on a constant basis and smile in your face, but when your not around all type of ish is going on.

Or maybe not. Maybe nothing is going on...maybe you have the perfect boyfriend/girlfriend and that person would not betray you at all.

That is the one thing that is so hard to do, is to trust someone again after they betrayed it.
In my relationship my current boyfriend in the beginning had me believing that he was so innocent. Like literally I never had anything to worry about, because he would be all on me and call me all hours of the day and want to be around me on a constant basis.

He did something a while ago and I am not going to go into detail, but from that day I never fully trusted him again. Everytime his phone goes off sometimes, especially a text, I am ultra paranoid...

I am paranoid of the unknown. I dont like what I cant see. I dont like assuming things either, but sometimes honestly I cannot help it. I went from I 100% trusted him to now I am 50% trust 50% on edge.

So yes I confess that I am paranoid. Very and it hurts sometimes because I really dont want to be this way, but what can I do. There are females in this world who do not care that my man is in a relationship with me. Its so competitive out here with the female to male ratio (especially in my city) of 20:1 that girl will go out their way to break up a happy home just so that they can have someone.

But as I said before, I do want to trust because I dont want to live my life stress out if there is something fishy going on. Hopefully I can get like I did before. Trust need to be regained.

They say people are paranoid because they have something to hide themselves. Not me! I am not doing anything and that is what make it worst. I am completely honest and sometimes I feel like my honesty and faithfulness gets taken for granted.

But let me stop running my mouth. Things are good but you know...you hit bumpy roads in your relationships sometimes. That is life and you live, love, and learn.

Here is Kanye West's new video "Paranoid". Rhianna looks like she is still in the "Disturbia" video. Interesting...

LOVE STORY

WARNING: If you are squeamish and hate lovey dovey stuff, this is overkill! Christina Milan must be gagging right now!

OMG this is so cute...

I am so jealous!!! They really look like they are in love.

I am not gonna lie, I thought at first this was another Hollywood publicity stunt, I dont believe in love @ first sight, but damnit they are kind of making me change my mind.

This is the cutest video ever. I am actually happy for them. They look have and in love...people doubted them but they are still together.

The cutest tribute, love video montage ever!

Aww I hope I can have my own love story similar to this one day.

Sidenote: Watch Christina Milan and Dream try to top that! **giggles**

TO THE MAN I CARE ABOUT

Resubmitted via Myspace Blog

To the Man I Care About Category: Romance and Relationships

He probably will never read this but anyways...

This is dedicated to the man I care about.I met you not too long ago and you changed my life. I may not speak on it everyday or at all because sometimes I cant express in human words how much you mean to me.

Yes we had our battles, some we are still fighting, but surprisingly we are still here. There are things I wish I could change, for the sake of our present not being so cloudly. For our trust levels to be stronger, for us to open up to one another better.

It is hard...you dont even know the half sometimes. I know that I am truely blessed to have you in my life. Even if it is not what is cracked up to be, I cherish the moments we have the connection. The moments where I can look in your eyes and see you smiling because of me. In those same eyes I see hope, passion, and yes a future in the windows to your soul.

You make me appreciate why things happen for a reason. For me to let go and to be led to you has to be a gift from God. I asked for someone like you, and my father in Heaven delievered.

Sometimes I am scared because I do not want to open up old wounds of a brokenheart, and thats when I just keep faith. Faith that on our bumpy road we will be able to ride smoothly together on this challenging journey we call "life". Patience & Positivity is the only thing that will keep us strong and if we lack one or both, we will lose it all.

From the bottom of my heart, I want this to work more than anything...because I am willing to put in the "work" & even the "overtime" because I believe in you. I believe in "US".

As long as there is a God I will keep the faith and knowing that my Angel on Earth (which is you) is someone worthy of my heart (LTG).

random quotes of my emotions: all so true